Knight in shining armour
by ice-queen-beauchamp
Summary: Connie Beauchamp tends to keep to herself, and that's how she likes it. Until, that is, she spends five hours with the person she least expects.
1. A Secret To Hide

It was a little known fact that Connie Beauchamp was sad. Not just a little sad, but the kind of sadness that would be professionally classified as depression, not that she acknowledged that. Connie even slept in the on call room in a bid to avoid her now empty house, since Grace had moved to America. But poor old Connie went about her daily life without telling anyone, especially not her colleagues. Until, that is, she was forced to spend five hours with the person she least expected.

Connie stepped into the hospital lift quickly, she had a meeting with Guy Self and she was already half an hour late.

The doors to the lift were just closing as Cal stepped in "Sorry Co- Mrs Beauchamp, I'm just taking this file upstairs" he said, holding up the brown file defensively.

Connie just raised her eyebrows in response, not wanting to get trapped in another monotonous conversation and the lift started moving smoothly upwards. Suddenly there was a loud noise above and the lift stopped with a jolt. "Oh for goodness sake not now" Connie muttered, stabbing various buttons on the panel with a perfectly manicured finger, in an attempt to get the lift moving again. When nothing worked however, she turned to Cal and was about to ask him for help when her phone started ringing in her hand; Zoe. "Yes?" She snapped, wanting to get to her meeting as soon as possible "Connie, are you in the lift?"

"Yes, so is Dr Knight, why do you ask?"

"We heard it break down and Robyn said she saw you go in there, they think it'll take around five hours to get you out"

"Five hours, Zoe that's ridiculous -"

"Look Connie I've got to go, sorry"

With a sigh Connie turned around and explained the situation Cal, but she forgot to mention one small detail; she was extremely claustrophobic.

Half an hour. That's all Connie could manage before she started to panic. The two doctors were sat on the lift floor, their backs leaning against the wall, in complete and utter silence. Connie was trying to regulate her breathing in an attempt to show no sign of weakness through her icy exterior. "Connie?" Asked Cal "Connie are you okay?"

"Uh... Fine... Just a little... Claustrophobic"

Cal grabbed her hand noticing how is was already a little clammy, she made an obvious attempt to pull away but Cal was persistent "Connie, I need you to calm down okay, you're having a panic attack"

Connie tried but it didn't seem to be working, "Crap" Cal muttered, picking up Connie's phone and ringing Zoe, who answered instantly.

"Connie? Is everyth-"

"Zoe its Cal, Connie's having a panic attack, she's claustrophobic" He turned away from Connie slightly and whispered so to not panic her further "I think she's about the pass out"

"Oh god, right um okay, if she passes out put her head in your lap and keep an eye on her breathing, the engineers are working as fast as they can"

"Okay, thanks Zoe" Cal put the phone down and turned back to Connie. "They're working as quickly as possible"

Connie managed a weak nod in response before falling into Cals arms, unconscious.


	2. A Trip Down Memory Lane

((A/N this is dreadful but whatever))

When Connie awoke, she looked up to see Cal staring down at her intently "Hey" he said, leaning back as she sat up slowly. "You had a panic attack, you were out for about half an hour, I was worried about you"

Connie stood up abruptly, ignoring the doctors sentiment of sympathy "I need to get out of here" she said, her voice wavering slightly.

"Connie, we've got to wait"

"Oh shut up" she muttered clawing at the doors, failing to open them.

Carefully, Cal sat Connie down again and put his arms around her slight waist in an attempt to comfort her and to keep her still.

"Do you know what caused your claustrophobia?"

"Dr Kni-"

"Connie, talking about this kind of thing is supposed to help"

Connie was about to tell him that she-didn't-need-his-help-thank-you-very-much, but something inside her told her to give him a chance.

"I was seven. My parents left me in our car with our dog, the dog got spooked and bit me."

"Where?"

Connie sighed and pulled up her trouser leg a little, revealing a faint scar which you wouldn't notice unless you knew it was there.

"My dog was put down" she whispered "I've hated small spaces ever since"

Cal looked at the lengthy scar, and gave his broken colleague a small, comforting squeeze, he understood now how fragile she was and how many secrets she kept hidden away from those around her. For the first time he noticed the bags under her eyes and her small timid frame and as Connie regulated her breathing Cal sat in silence thinking of the beauty that she tried so hard to disguise with her icy demeanour.

Connie sat back, leaning into his chest as he took both of her slim hands in his own. "You should get some sleep, you seem tired"

"I'm fine" Connie responded as her stomach made a noise. A sharp look of embarrassment quickly passed over her face but was soon replaced with an expression Cal couldn't quite read.

"When did you last eat?"

"This morning" Connie replied defensively, but Cal chose not to comment on it - he didn't want to start an argument.

Connie sighed and thought about how hungry she was. Truthfully, she hadn't eaten for a two days, but Cal didn't need to know that and besides, she had lasted longer than that without food in the past.

3 hours had passed since the lift had broken and Connie was feeling more claustrophobic than ever.

Cal was next to her on his phone, playing a game and the engineers had made no progress.

Connie picked up the brown paper file Cal had been taking upstairs and looked through it; 'Mr Brown' she read '54. Needing a colonoscopy'

Not wanting to read further, Connie set the file down next to her and looked up at Cal who was staring firmly at his phone; "You all hate me, don't you?" She asked without hesitating.

Cal looked up slowly, unsure if she was serious or not - but of course, Connie Beauchamp never joked, at least not with the likes of Caleb Knight. "Well uh no.. I mean yes... But"

Connie shook her head dismissively

"I'm just trying my best, I don't mean to come across as harsh."

"I'm sure you don't, but these new hours are ridiculous"

She looked away slowly from the doctor and closed her eyes, attempting to repress an oncoming panic attack and stopping any further conversation.

A sudden wave of courage swept over Cal - "I think the reason people dislike you is because you're so secretive, a closed book compared to the rest of us, and I know you may not want to share everything but you haven't even tried to make friends, you just sit in your office and occasionally shout at Rita and to be honest Connie, it's getting really tiring for us all."

The clinical lead opened her eyes and shot him a glare "Dr Knight," she stated flatly "if you think I would ever make friends with imbeciles like you, then you have another thing coming. I'm here to run this department; not win a popularity contest."

"Despite that fact that you just called be an imbecile, I have never been more attracted to you." Cal muttered, and with that he kissed her.

Connie responded eagerly, yet the couple had failed to notice that the lift doors had opened and watching them was the entirety of the ED department, shocked looks sketched on all of their faces.


	3. Unspoken Fears

(A/N This is short but it's just a filler chapter, and for those of you wanting Connie to be rushed into resus or something similar, soon, I promise ;) )

Zoe stepped forward and cleared her throat loudly, causing the duo to jump apart from each other. 'Shit' Cal whispered under his breath.

'Ah, doctor Hanna' Connie smiled awkwardly and then stood up 'I never though I'd be happy to see you' and she looked around at the rest of the staff whilst trying to maintain her professional appearance 'well then, get back to work all of you, there's patients to treat!' And she stalked into her office, blushing a little and leaving Cal behind. Quickly grabbing the folder, Cal stumbled to his feet and followed her, ignoring the whispers coming from the rest of the ED staff as he entered her office.

Connie was waiting at her office door expectantly and she closed the door as soon as he walked in, leaning up against it and sighing.

"So..." Started Cal in his usual flirtatious tone "we should go on a date."

"A date? After what just happened?"

"Yes. You wont have to worry about being seen with me in public..."

Connie but her lip and thought about his proposal, he was right she guessed, and she had been awfully lonely lately with Grace gone.

"Okay."

"Great" said Cal a little shocked at the lack of convincing he had to do "I'll see you tonight, text me your address"

Cal left his bosses office looking very proud of himself and went to find his little brother. "Hey nibbles," he said leaning on the desk in the staff room. "Don't suppose you could lend me some money... For a date?"

Ethan's head shot up from his paperwork and his eyes focused on his older brother "Please tell me... I mean.. Not Connie..."

Cal smirked "Sorry little brother, I know you had your eye on her"

"What?! No I didn't!" Ethan protested as his brother laughed, clearly amused by his outburst.

"Anyway... 80quid?"

Ethan sighed "Fine... But don't bring her home with you"

"Connie's classier than that, nibbles" muttered Cal taking the notes from his brother, "Thanks"

Cal arrived outside Connie's house at 6:30, he was dressed in his most expensive black suit and white shirt; he wanted to impress his date. Connie's house was large and clearly reflected her salary, her car was parked in-front of the house and sparkled in the moonlight and Cal looked at it longingly, wondering how much it cost.

Swiftly, he got out of the car and knocked on Connie's door, which she opened a few minutes later in a stunning floor length black dress and matching cardigan.

Cal was almost speechless, "You look... Amazing"

Connie blushed slightly and followed him to his car, she wasn't used to receiving compliments.

The couple entered a fairly small restaurant with high class furniture and a menu to match, and they sat down to order- foie gras for Cal and Osso De Bucco for Connie.

When the food arrived Cal watched as Connie's expression changed and all of a sudden he realised, it was the same expression he had noticed that day in the lift. The one he could quite read. But now he knew, the expression was hunger mixed with Connie's unspoken fear of gaining weight.


	4. Truth Telling And A Hospital Visit

(Some drama this time ;) Maybe I'll kill Connie off ;) *evil laughter*)

Cal look up at his date an spoke softly "Connie.. I want you to answer this question truthfully, when did you last eat?"

Connie bit her lip and stared down at her plate, moving her food around with a fork.

"Connie.." Said Cal encouragingly.

She looked up at him, tears threatening to spill from her eyes "Two days ago.."

Cal put some money on the table and stood up, offering Connie his hand "Come on"

She hesitated and then took his hand, following him out of the restaurant and into his car.

Turning slightly on his seat, Cal turned to face Connie who was staring out of the window and crying silently, tears spilling over her freckled cheeks and onto her dress.

"We can go anywhere you want, I just want you to eat something even if we go back to yours and share a slice of toast"

Connie nodded and despite Cal's numerous attempts to make conversation she stayed silent until they were sitting at the island in her brightly lit vintage kitchen.

Cal looked around the room noticing small insights into Connie's personality such as the family photographs on the fridge and the large coffee machine in the corner. He watched as she delicately spread butter on the warm toast and cut it in two before setting the small plate in front of him and sitting down.

"I can make more of yo-"

"It's fine, Connie." He hesitated before asking his next question "Do you always go two days without food?"

"Sometimes." She said quietly "I just drink coffee and get on with it.. Do you mind if I go and get changed into something more comfortable?"

"No, I'll um.. Wait here."

Connie nodded slightly and left the room in search of her jeans and favourite jumper.

After a few minutes of waiting Cal stood up and walked over to the coffee machine and reached over to turn it on. He was just about to decide which kind of coffee his boss might like when he heard a loud crash coming from Connie's lounge.

He walked curiously down the corridor and into the lounge scanning the room before his eyes finally settled on Connie's slim figure on the floor with blood dripping down her face.

He was at her side in an instant. Feeling for a pulse that didn't exist. She'd tripped or fainted, he didn't know, then hit her head on a large wooden cabinet now stained with blood. He fumbled for his phone and put it in loudspeaker before beginning compressions and talking the call operator through what had happened.

Just as Connie regained a pulse, Dixie and Ian arrived.

"Cal what are you do-" Dixie suddenly noticed the woman on the floor "Right, okay, Ian we need a stretcher!"

Despite Cals pleas to take Connie to St James, they soon arrived at Holby's ED department and hurried into resus.

"This is Connie Beauchamp, age 46, lost consciousness and hit her head on a wooden cabinet, she has a large laceration and she stopped breathing before we arrived - luckily doctor Knight was on scene and performed CPR, GCS 9 throughout and no other injuries present."

Zoe, Dylan and a nurse gathered around Connie, "Right we need a screen up I'm sure Connie would prefer some privacy, ABC's U's and E's and an MRI scan asap, thank you" said Zoe taking charge as Cal watched from the corner of the room praying she would be okay.


	5. Conscientious Objector

(I have a really cruel idea for a way to end this fic {which won't be anytime soon} and it might just about kill me)

Cal drifted in and out of consciousness all night. The plastic chair he sat on was uncomfortable and the room was eerily cold yet he refused to leave Connie's side. He held her soft hand and watched her chest rise and fall to make sure she was still breathing, he didn't understand how someone this beautiful could be so self conscious to the point where they starved themselves and hid away. He didn't understand how she could come across so strong, yet behind closed doors she was crumbling.

The MRI had revealed no brain damage and Zoe had said Connie was lucky. Cal had wanted to laugh at her then, but his inappropriate sense of humour had disappeared, all he could focus on was Connie. Truth is, Cal was torn. He knew Zoe needed to know about Connie not eating, but he couldn't risk Connie not speaking to him again. He mulled over his decision for hour after hour before finally deciding to tell Zoe who, just at the moment, walked into the room.

"It's strange isn't it?" Said Zoe "to see her so fragile."

Cal nodded in agreement "I need to tell you something, about Connie, but you can't tell anyone."

Zoe looked at him "Okay?"

"I think she has an eating disorder. She hasn't eaten for two days and it's not the first time, she practically lives on coffee"

"Right," started Zoe, looking at her boss with a forlorn expression "I'll get a parenteral drip set up."

Zoe left an hour later and Cal remained at Connie's bedside sleeping peacefully. And an hour after that Connie opened her eyes, wincing at the pain the drip was causing in her arm. She sat up slowly, ignoring the pounding sensation in her head and looked around before realising she was in Holby's resus. Wanting to make a quick escape, she fiddled with the cannula on her hand, she'd removed them from patients more times that she could count but she never realised how hard it was to remove your own. Eventually, Connie just ripped it out, causing her skin to tear and bleed. She crept out of the room, relieved that she hadn't been changed into a hospital gown and feeling slightly guilty about leaving Cal.

Connie managed to sneak her way right out of the hospital and rang for a taxi. A few minutes before her ride home was due to arrive, Zoe stepped out of the ED. "Connie?" She said walking over, cigarette in hand, "You're supposed to be in bed."

"And you're supposed to be cutting down." she replied sarcastically, nodding towards her colleagues cigarette.

"Connie seriously, Cal told me you don't eat, and your hand is bleeding... Oh god please tell me you didn't rip your cannula out?!"

"Dr Hanna, my private life is none of your concern, please return to work." Connie tried to act strong, but she was shaking from the cold, and being thin didn't help the matter.

"Connie if you leave you'll regret it, you won't get the help you need and you'll never recover."

"I told you, I don't need your he-" Connie felt dizzy and she started to fall to the floor, but her fall was broken by Zoe catching her.

"You don't make it easy, do you?" She asked her unconscious superior sarcastically before calling Max over to help.

Waking up twenty minutes later, Connie found herself unable to move her arms due to a pair of restraints tied to the sides of her bed. Zoe was next to her, reattaching the parenteral drip.

"Is his really necessary?" She asked.

"I believe you're at risk of obstructing your treatment, and currently you have no rights to choose your treatment options as its obvious you can't take care of yourself, so yes, it is necessary."

Zoe sighed and looked at Cal, who had slept through the whole ordeal.

"Connie I want to give you some advice, I've known Cal for a while now and I've never seen him look after anyone the way he has for you since you came in last night. He's held your hand, talked to you even when you couldn't hear him because he cares for you. He may even be falling for you. So please just realise that people are here for you, people that want you to be healthy so stop trying to run from them because eventually they'll stop coming after you and you'll have no one."


	6. Cakes And Tears

(Lame but there will be cuteness in the next update okay bye)

Two days later and Connie was discharged on two conditions - firstly, she had to see a counsellor and secondly, someone had to stay with her at home. Cal volunteered to stay with her, glad to be getting some sleep in an actual bed and Connie agreed to counselling, albeit apprehensively, and as long as she could switch to private health care.

The drive to Connie's was silent and Connie fiddled with the hospital band on her wrist, they ate in silence - or Cal did, Connie just pushed the food around her plate, and then they went to bed, with Cal in the spare room, in silence.

By 2am Connie still hadn't slept, she had tossed and turned all night with no avail. She got up and padded downstairs to get a glass of water and when she returned Cal was sitting at the top of the stairs waiting for her.

"Hey." she said and sat down next to him, taking a sip of the water.

"What are you doing up?"

"I heard you get up, I wanted to check you're okay."

"Oh. I'm fine." She muttered, looking into the glass.

Cal put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer "No, you're not. Talk to me Connie."

She sighed and leant into his chest, he smelt like freshly washed cotton and summer air.

"I just feel.. Sad. And tired. All the time."

Cal rubbed her back comfortingly as she looked up at him, "I think I have something that might help." And he kissed her softly, more carefully than he had in the lift and he let his hands fall into her hair.

When the couple broke apart, Connie was more relaxed yet tears still threatened to spill from her eyes. Cal wiped them away and picked her up bridal style, she was too tired to protest. He carried her into the spare room and laid her on the bed before laying next to her, she instantly cuddled up to him resting her head on his chest, and for the first time in a while, Connie Beauchamp fell asleep peacefully.

She woke, washed and dressed before Cal and finished the paperwork she had left over from the day in the lift and she was sitting at the kitchen island and was just about to write a note for Cal when he walked into the kitchen, still in his pyjamas.

"You're up early" muttered Connie sarcastically.

"You're not seriously going into work?" He asked.

"I don't see why I shouldn't."

"You hardly slept last night, you still haven't eaten and you need to make an appointment with a councillor."

"I can survive on four hours sleep, I don't need to eat and I'll do it later." She retorted firmly.

"No, you'll forget. Do it now and take the day off."

"No."

"Connie -"

"I'm going."

"Connie seriously-"

"Stop talking." She said getting up and gathering her things.

Cal walked past her and locked the door, shoving the only key into his pyjama pocket. "Stay home. You were hospitalised for goodness sake Connie, you need to slow down!"

She looked at him harshly. "I will not be told what to do in my own home. Give me the key."

"No. Let's bake cakes."

"Cal I nee- Cakes? Seriously?" She looked bemused. "You want me to take a day off to make cakes?"

"Yes." Mumbled Cal, his ears reddening slightly.

"Fine. We'll make cakes." She couldn't help but add- "Maybe we can dress up as fairies too."


	7. Mess

Connie was in charge of measuring the butter and sugar and Cal was in charge of measuring the flour and getting the eggs from the fridge. Connie flawlessly measured her ingredients and handed the kitchen scales to Cal, yet somehow, he managed to drop the whole bag of flour onto the floor, causing a huge white cloud to spread throughout the room. "Cal!" Shouted Connie "My hair! My kitchen!"

Cal laughed and picked up one of the eggs, walking through the flour to find her, when he did he pulled her into a hug. "Hey, we'll get it cleaned up."

"No, you will mister, you made the mess."

"If you insist." And then he cracked an egg over her head.

The egg dripped down Connie's face and flour settled on top as she stood there, paralysed by shock.

"Right, that's it."

For a moment Cal thought he had gone to far and that she might kick him out but the next thing he new and egg had been thrown at his chest and the yolk was slowly sliding down his chest and onto his pyjama shorts.

Connie walked over. "Your clothes are dirty" she mumbled fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

"As are yours." He replied dryly.

She looked up at him with wide eyes before pulling off his shirt and throwing it on the floor, more of the flour that still surrounded them settled on his shoulders.

Painfully slowly, Cal undid the buttons on her blouse and delicately discarded it on the floor before kissing her more passionately than he had even kissed anyone before.

The couple soon retreated to Connie's bedroom and after making a mess of her bedsheets, they lay breathlessly next to one another.

"Wow." Breathed Connie almost inaudibly.

"Indeed." Replied Cal.

"We should probably clean up."

Cal got up and walked out of the room leaving Connie slightly confused, only he returned a few minutes later and picked Connie up bridal style for the second time that week. "Cal-"

"It's a good thing you're not wearing any clothes" he mumbled and he walked into the bathroom placing her in the bath filled with bubbles and warm water.

"Will you be joining me?"

"No, I'm going to clean your kitchen." He kissed her quickly on the lips and ventured downstairs to start his mission.

Connie sat back and relaxed before remembering she still had to ring and make an appointment with a councillor. She frowned, maybe a quick email would suffice? Moving slowly so not to make much noise she snuck into her bedroom to retrieve her phone before returning to her bath and opening her emails.

She found the address online and began composing her email-

"Dear Mrs Smith, my name is Connie Beauchamp and I was recently released from hospital on the condition that I make an appointment with you. I hope you can get back to me and I am available to meet with you anytime after 7pm on a weekday.

Thank you for your cooperation - Connie Beauchamp, Holby emergency department clinical lead.'

Feeling satisfied with what she had written she pressed send, set her phone on the floor and relaxed almost instantly falling asleep.

Meanwhile, Cal had cleared the kitchen and was actually making cakes with spare ingredients he had found in the cupboards. He put them in the oven and went upstairs to check in on Connie.

He found her asleep, shattered from lack of sleep and their bedroom antics. He walked into her bedroom and rummaged through her clothes until he found a pair of pyjamas then he lifted her out of the bath, dressed her and put her to bed in the spare room. She didn't even stir.

(Just incase this wasn't obvious, they totally did it)


	8. A Shocking Conclusion

(A/N this is ridiculously short but okay. I've planned the rest of this fic {it's going to be 20 chapters with a possible sequel yay} but I have three chapters that I need to fill so any ideas would be appreciated. Also, all your reviews are so cute that you all x)

~1 month later~

Connie had met with her counsellor once to discuss an 'official treatment plan'. She was tall and blonde and she had offered Connie a biscuit, which she has politely declined. Her first actual appointment was at 7:30, two hours from now and Connie was dreading it.

She didn't feel well either but she had a feeling she knew what it was and she didn't want to acknowledge it.

By 6:30 the sickness had become unbearable and Connie finally gave in and ordered herself a blood test. She waited patiently for the results, issuing them under a false name and when they were handed to her she rushed back to her office and sat down before opening them.

"Shit." She muttered, it was unlike Connie to swear, she read over the results again just to make sure she had read them right, and she had - 'pregnant.'

Connie sat in her office with her head in her hands until 7:15. How would she tell Cal? How would she tell Grace? Oh god, Cal would make her 'eat enough for two', she'd gain so much weight. Just at that moment Cal knocked on the door. "Are you ready? I can drop yo- Hey are you okay?" The concern was evident in his voice and he bent down next to her. She didn't move. "Connie what's going on?"

"I uh.. I'm lot going tonight." She said turning to face him.

"Why? Has something happened."

"No... Yes... Cal, uh, I'm pregnant."

"Pregnant?"

"That's what I said."

"Right, okay listen to me, you're going to go to your appointment and we'll talk about this later, okay?" He said, a small smile toying on his lips.

'Okay' she whispered.

When Connie returned home Cal was waiting in her living room. "Hey, how did it go?"

Connie bit her lip to stop herself from crying and nodded silently as Cal pulled her into a loving embrace. She started to sob quietly into his chest, covering his grey tshirt with tears.

"Shh it'll be okay." He said soothingly.

"I'm scared Cal."

"I know."

"How am I supposed to tell Grace? What if I starve the baby before it's even born?"

"We'll tell Grace together when she next comes to stay and you're not going to starve this baby, I promise."

Cal held his girlfriend close and neither one of them moved for an hour, until Cal noticed that Connie was falling asleep in his arms.

He shook her awake softly, "Connie.. Hey come on, we need to eat."

For once Connie ate more than a few mouthfuls and Cal was pleased with her progress but Connie's mind was focused on other things, how would Grace react? She couldn't even tell her face to face considering she was on the other side of the world and Grace didn't have the most controllable temper in the world, either. Why did she have to get herself into this mess in the first place?


	9. Every Little Thing's Gonna Be Alright

The next weekend Connie had arranged for Grace to stay and she spent the whole of Saturday morning pacing around the kitchen waiting for her to arrive.

"Okay that's enough." Said Cal getting up and standing in front of his girlfriend, "It's going to be okay."

Connie bit her nail. "She has the worst temper Cal, she's going to get upset."

"Calm down. We'll sort this."

Connie was about to respond when the doorbell rang. "Shit." She muttered.

Cal opened the door with Connie beside him and there stood Grace with her grandmother, Grace stepped inside looking suspiciously at Cal before making her way into the kitchen in search of a snack.

"I'll be back to pick her up in a few days." Said Audrey before walking away without another word.

"She seems pleasant." Muttered Cal, closing the door.

Connie mumbled something inaudibly and followed Grace into the kitchen.

"Grace, this is Cal-"

"Is he your boyfriend?"

"Well, um, yes."

"Ok."

Connie smiled, her daughter had only been away for a month and she was already a lot more calm, then Connie frowned as she realised it was because she didn't play a huge role in Grace's life anymore.

"We've got some news actually, darling."

Grace looked up at her mother. "What news?"

"You're going to have a little brother or sister."

Grace hesitated before speaking softly. "I want to come home mum."

Connie stared at her daughter. "Are you not enjoying living with your dad?"

"I am." Mumbled Grace. "But I want to come home, please Mummy, ring him and tell him I'm not coming back, I want to be a big sister."

Connie spent two hours arguing with Sam on the phone, they both had Grace's best interests at heart but as Connie had reminded him several times; "It's what Grace wants."

"I just don't see why she needs to move again." Grumbled Sam.

"Listen," replied Connie "This is what your daughter wants, she wants to come home and be a family with me, Cal and the baby. Are you really going to tell her no, Sam? Just imagine the look on her face, the tears and the tantrums. I wasn't able to look after her like a proper mum before but I can now, I have stability and I want a second chance with her. I don't want her half way across the world, she's been with me since she was born and I'm not going to let you take her away from me."

"Fine. Do what you want." Mumbled Sam before slamming the pone down.

Later that evening, after the excitement of Grace coming home had dispersed the small family sat on the sofa sharing Grace's favourite takeaway pizza. Cal and Grace had been getting on like a house on fire and Connie watched with a smile on her face as she watched them laugh and play together, she smiled as Cal carried a sleeping Grace to bed and tuck her in carefully and she even smiled when Cal kissed her, he'd never seen her so happy. Connie thought about all the experiences yet to come and she knew everything would be okay.


	10. News To Share

(A/N I'm suffering from writers block so I'm sorry for the tragedy that is this chapter.)

When Cal returned to work the following Monday he noticed how most of the staff seemed to be avoiding him. Half way through his shift he pulled Lily aside. "Why is everyone avoiding me?" he asked.

Lily raised her eyebrows at him "Well, Dr Knight, you are dating our boss you could easily get us all fired."

"Oh." he mumbled. "I guess there's no way of escaping that."

"No." said Lily irritably "Did you need anything else?"

Cal looked up "Actually, I want to tell you something, meet me in the staff room in five minutes."

When Lily arrived Cal was waiting patiently, tapping his fingers on the counter top.

"This better be important." said Lily, closing the door behind her.

"It is... Connie's pregnant."

Before Lily could respond Ethan walked in. "I seriously hope you're not trying to pick up girls whilst you're dating the ice queen herself." he mumbled accusingly.

"Not this time little brother, Connie's pregnant."

Ethan turned away from the locker he had since opened. "Please tell me this is an April fool's joke."

The trio spent the remainder of their break discussing the possible situations Cal would find himself in after becoming a father and Ethan beamed when Cal mentioned he would be an uncle. They were just about to return to work when Connie walked in looking pale and ill. "Dr. Knight," she said, trying to sound strong infront of Lily and Ethan. "Can I speak to you for a moment? Alone." Lily and Ethan left the room as quickly as possible both muttering a quick 'congratulations' as they passed their boss.

Connie sat down opposite Cal. "You told them." she said flatly.

"Yes... Sorry."

"Don't be, it was bound to come out at some point."

"Are you okay?" asked Cal, changing the subject. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Just some morning sickness. Anyway, I had a call this morning, our first scan is going to be at 10 weeks because I had problems with Grace, I'm five weeks now."

Cal nodded. "Okay, I'll sort my shift out... Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'll be fine. Do you think we should make an announcement, you know, tell everyone?"

Cal shrugged. "Maybe we should leave it until after the scan?"

"Okay. I'm going to pick up Grace." said Connie looking at the watch on her slim wrist. "I hope public school is better for her."

"I'll meet you at home when I've finished here." Said Cal standing up and wrapping his arms around her lovingly from behind. "And then I'll cook your favourite dinner and maybe I'll run us a bath."

Connie smiled a genuine smile. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Zoe sat in her office flicking through her paperwork. Of course she had heard Connie's news from Max, who found out from Robyn, who found out from Lily, who found out from Cal. Connie was rarely kind to her staff at the best of times and with all the pregnancy hormones, Zoe knew she was in for a tough ride ahead.


	11. A Game To Play

(Two updates in one day ;) Hope you enjoyy)

Connie sat staring at a plant in the corner of the small waiting room, she was due for her first baby scan any minute now. Cal was next to her slowly rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand, he was talking to her but she wasn't listening, she was anxious that something would be wrong, maybe she still wasn't eating enough. Infact, she knew she wasn't eating enough despite upping her intake to one meal a day. She'd watched a total of five women leave since she had been here, each smiling at the pictures in their hands, each with a glow that could only be described as golden. She knew she didn't have a glow. Instead she looked in the mirror each morning greeted by her grey complexion and the growing bags underneath her eyes. Most of the time she didn't bother with make-up anymore, being pregnant was a huge strain on her body and Connie couldn't remember if it had been this bad when she was pregnant with Grace. She'd been forgetting a lot of things lately actually, maybe I should ask the doctor about that she thought.

Connie let her eyes wonder and then focused on a poster with one corner falling from the wall, it had a picture of a baby boy. She looked at Cal, his eyes were focusing on a different poster, with a baby girl on it.

"Do you want a boy or a girl?" she asked.

"A boy." said Cal.

Silence. Connie returned to taking in her surroundings, most of the women were younger than her and Connie seemed to be the only one in the room who was more anxious than excited. A door opened and a woman stepped out, she was crying and a man was comforting her. Connie felt her chest tighten and she prayed she wouldn't find herself in the same position, it would kill her.

Ten minutes later and the same door opened again, a woman in a white nurses uniform stepped out and read from a clipboard, "Mrs. Beauchamp?" she called. Connie stood up with Cal and followed the woman into a small examination room where a female doctor with blonde hair was sat waiting. She reminded Connie of her counsellor.

"Hi, I'm Dr Walker, could you sit on the bed for me, and there's a space for your husband over there."

"He's not my husband." replied Connie quickly, earning her a look from Cal.

"Oh, sorry, I just assumed... Anyway, this is your first scan, correct?"

Connie nodded and looked at Cal, he looked hurt.

"Right okay, this gel is going to be cold." said Dr Walker and she lifted Connie's top slightly before squirting the gel onto her stomach.

It took Dr. Walker a few minutes to position the scan properly. 'She's hopeless.' thought Connie and she could tell by the look on Cal's face that he was thinking the exact same thing. Finally, the doctor smiled and turned away from the monitor, "I have some news, you're having twins!"

A few minutes later and the couple left the room, both still too shocked to speak.

"I uh.." started Cal. "This is good news, right?"

"Yes. Just a shock." mumbled Connie before taking his hand. "If they're both boys I think I'll cry, having two mini versions of you running round the house."

Cal smiled and kissed her cheek. "I'm already outnumbered by you and Grace, we need to think of some names."

"Yes, we do." said Connie getting into the passenger seat of Cal's car.

When they returned home they sat at the kitchen island with an array of baby naming books and magazines but after an hour they still hadn't found a single name that they both liked.

"I have an idea." smiled Cal mischievously. "Over the next week we have to record the first name of every patient we treat, then at the end of the week we'll see if there's any we both like."

Connie liked the idea of a challenge, she wanted to be the one to find perfect names for both of the babies. "You're on."


	12. Parks And Revelations

(A/N Three updates in one night okay wow. I need to set up a regular update day pfft)

By the end of the week Connie had 206 names. She'd worked as much over time as possible and she'd even sneaked out in the middle of the night when Cal was asleep so she could treat extra patients, prioritising them in order of which name she thought sounded best.

There we 5 rules she and Cal had to abide by;

The name had to sound reasonable with "Beauchamp-Knight".

No getting help from other members of staff.

Adding names that weren't the names of a patient was not allowed.

No stealing each others patients.

The patient must be discharged before the name could be added to the list.

Both had stuck to the rules yet Cal only managed half the names Connie did.

"I don't understand" muttered Cal, it was Sunday morning and him, Connie and Grace were having breakfast in the kitchen. "You're twice as busy as me normally, yet you still got more names."

"That's because I'm a winner." replied Connie with a wink.

"Ah, not yet, not until we decided on two boys names and two girls names."

They enlisted the help of Grace and by lunch time they had whittled it down to five boys names and five girls names with a majority of them being from Connie's list. The boys names were; Caspar, Alfred, Jude, William and Henry and the girls names were Freya, Kate, Addison, Sophie and Amanda (A personal favourite of Connie's.)

"I'm booorreeeedddd." moaned Grace. "Can we go to the park?"

Connie looked at her daughter. "Okay, go get dressed."

Cal looked up as Grace ran off upstairs. "Feeling defeated? My names are obviously going to win."

"Don't get ahead of yourself, I just want to spend some time with her, you know, make up for being a rubbish mum." She looked at the two lists, Grace had insisted she should write them and Connie could tell she had used her best handwriting, next to the names Jude, Henry, Kate and Amanda, her daughter had drawn a small pink heart. "Cal, I think I know which for names we should pick." she handed him the lists and his eyes scanned them quickly. He nodded, "These are perfect."

Whilst Grace was playing Connie sat on a near by bench and watched her, she thought about all the times she'd been a bad mother and she made herself a promise to be a better mother, to all three of her children. Connie thought about her own upbringing, her parents had always been busy and she too had been sent to a boarding school, most of the time she didn't go home when the other children did, she just spent time alone and she'd become a doctor to prove she was worth something.

10 minutes later and Cal arrived carrying two cups of steaming hot chocolate and a juice box for Grace, he joined Connie on the bench and handed her a hot chocolate. "Hey." he smiled. "What are you thinking about?"

"Being a parent."

Cal put his arm around her. "You're not a bad mother. I know you think you are, but you're not. I know you've had some difficulties in the past but the way you are with Grace, it's heart-warming Connie. I love the way your face lights up when you see her or when you hear her name and I know it kills you when you get called into work when you're trying to spend time with her, and she knows you love her."

By this point Connie was crying. "You don't understand. I'm still a bad parent, all her life she's been passed from person to person like she's not my responsibility. I just want to make things right."


	13. Refusal

(A/N I promise the end isn't as weird as it sounds, I just ran out of time, so I haven't proof read either...)

To put it simply, Cal was worried. He was worried about Connie, who had only spoken two words to him over the course of three days and he was worried about his unborn children. Several times he had found Connie crying alone yet each time she refused to tell him why and he wasn't the only one who had noticed Connie's strange behaviour.

"Cal, can I talk to you?" It was Charlie, with a look of concern on his face.

"Oh.. Sure." Cal followed him to a quiet corner of the ED.

"It's about Connie," started Charlie.

"Is she okay?" asked Cal, worried that she had fainted or something worse.

"Well that's what I was going to ask you, she seems very distracted, and she hasn't shouted at Rita in a while.."

Cal looked at the floor, he knew he should of questioned Connie further when she insisted nothing was wrong. He looked back up to Charlie and suddenly felt compelled to tell him. "She's hardly spoken to me in three days, and she keeps crying.. I don't know what's wrong and she wont tell me."

"Want me to speak to her?" asked Charlie, sensing that Cal wanted his help.

"Yes... Thankyou."

Connie, as always, was in her office flicking through paperwork and occasionally writing things down. Her dark hair was down and fell down one shoulder and her eyes were focused on the work in-front of her, yet she wasn't thinking about her work at all. At first, she didn't even notice Charlie had entered the room, until he closed the door with a sharp click. Connie jumped and looked up. "Oh, Charlie." her shoulders visibly tensed. "Can I help you?"

Charlie sat opposite her. "Connie, what's wrong?"

The woman squirmed uncomfortably under his gaze and she fiddled with the stethoscope around her neck. "I don't know what you mean." she muttered quietly, flicking her eyes back to the brown folder in-front of her, hoping that her colleague would leave.

But Charlie wasn't ready to give up. "You've spent your last two shifts locked in here, you haven't even muttered a mean comment to Rita once and Cal said-"

Connie cut him off. "Dr Knight," she said bitterly. "Should not be sharing my personal life with you. Or anyone else for that matter."

"He's worried about you."

"He'll get over it." responded Connie firmly.

Charlie sighed. "Listen to me Connie, you can't hide away in your office forever and you need to tell someone what's wrong, it doesn't matter who, just stop pushing Cal away."

Connie flinched at his words, it was the second time someone had told her not to shut Cal out. After a few awkward moment of silence, Charlie got up and left, leaving Connie to think about what he had said.

Connie set her pen down and picked up her phone, starting to type a text to Cal. "I'm going out for a while, it doesn't matter where I'm going, but could you please cover my shift and pick Grace up from school at 3pm. Thankyou." She let her thumb linger over the screen for a second before pressing send, then she removed the stethoscope from her neck, put on her coat and walked straight to her car.

After driving for an hour Connie finally pulled into a small car park, a tall industrial building loomed over her, Connie hadn't been here in years.


	14. You're Crazy

(Sorry for the late update but everything I've written lately is actual turtle SHIT. Also, updates will probably be less frequent because exam season aka the bane of my existence is coming up and Cal is really pissing me off lately, ugh but thankyou for all your reviews ily allllllll *cringes at self and leaves*)

Connie walked into the warehouse, it was a large open plan space and it took Connie a few minutes to adapt to the bright lighting over head. Once her eyes had adjusted she began to walk around, she was in a shop she hadn't visited since before Grace was born and it was filled with more baby products than Connie had remembered. Placing one hand over her small, yet noticeable bump, Connie walked towards a section of the store where all different types of cots were on display. After spending half an hour deciding which sleeping arrangements she wanted for the twins, Connie moved onto the next section, this time picking up a basket as she went. Just as she approached a section filled with designer baby clothes, her second favourite part of baby shopping, her phone began to vibrate in her pocket. Slowly, she took her phone from her pocket and looked at the caller ID; Cal. 'I might have guessed.' Connie sighed before answering.

"Connie? Where are you?"

"I'm shopping." she muttered flatly turning her attention to a tiny pair of boots. "I did text you."

"Shopping? Are you kidding me?! I was worried about you-"

"Well you don't have to be, I can take care of myself."

"Connie, listen to me, you haven't spoken to me in three days, and you keep crying, surely you can see where I'm coming from? Where are you and what are you shopping for? I'm coming to join you."

"Cal there's no need, I'm over an hour away and I'm shopping for the twins." her voice softened at the mention of her children.

"An hour away? Text me the address."

Connie knew there was no point in protesting, Cal was too stubborn. "Fine." she didnt give him a chance to respond before she terminated the call, text him the address and shoved her phone back in her pocket.

Cal arrived after 40 minuets and he found Connie in a large clothing section, a large pile of tiny clothes filling the basket she held in her hand. He slipped his arm around her waist and kissed her cheek. "You're crazy."

She turned to face him, setting her basket on the floor before allowing herself to be embraced into his arms. "I'm sorry." she whispered.

"Sorry? For what?"

"For shutting you out." She closed her eyes and breathed in her boyfriends sweet scent. "And for leaving like that."

He hugged her tightly for a few minutes before realising she'd fallen asleep in his arms, it broke his heart to wake her, and he shook her gently. "Connie.."

She stirred before opening her eyes and looking up at him, slightly disoriented. Cal tucked a piece of hair behind her ear allowing his hand to linger for a second before returning it to her side. "Was there anything else you needed before we leave?"

"Oh, um, the cots I couldn't carry them."

"I'll go get them you can go wait in your car, I won't be long."

"What about your car? Didn't you drive here?"

"I got Ethan to drop me off... What cots did you pick?"

"The white ones, near the back. I'll see you in a bit."

Connie handed Cal the clothes she'd chosen and walked out to her car. She sat in the drivers seat and relaxed. Cal followed her a few minutes later carrying two large boxes and two heaving carrier bags, and he managed to squeeze them into the boot of Connie's car with minimal effort. He walked round to the drivers door and opened it, "You fell asleep standing up, I'm not letting you drive."

Connie started to protest but she soon gave in, "Fine. But I'm having cravings, we need to stop at tesco."


End file.
